“For out of His fullness [the superabundance of His grace and truth] we have all received grace upon grace [spiritual blessing upon spiritual blessing, favor upon favor, and gift heaped upon gift].”
John 1:16 AMP
The first time I read this verse I visualized a turquoise sea and wave after wave of blessings washing over me, wave after wave of grace, an endless supply as deep and vast as the ocean. Unending as far as the eye can see. I could hear that calming restful, repetitive sound of waves crashing onto the sand. Taking this scripture to heart (as with any scripture) was a transformative experience.
It is possible to let go and let yourself release all of the expectations you held for yourself, to no longer strive to prove something. For me, after a deep sense of grace and salvation, I noticed myself feeling lighter and lighter. I lost the sense of desperation I was carrying. Desperation is simply the effect of feeling like we must struggle on our own to make our goals and dreams happen.
Letting go is a process. Whenever I find myself feeling frustrated I can usually pinpoint the emotion of frustration to the act of trying to force something. Swimming against the current of how my life is suppose to be flowing. So many times I catch myself in this state of panic and control and just allow myself to visualize the waves crashing, washing in grace upon grace. Being overtaken by gift after gift.
Recently I read this segment of a book by Gabby Bernstein. “We’re taught that we must struggle to achieve and that success comes from “making things happen.” We learn that good things don’t happen without a lot of blood, sweat, and tears. I challenge you to move beyond these beliefs of limitation and suffering.”
There have been so many areas brought to my attention these past couple years. I have had to let go of fears over my son’s health. There were times I would obsess over life decisions, rather than just trust that God will direct my steps into the right job.
I shared on Instagram recently that I took a few steps backwards and began getting into a cycle of worry and control over my career path and our life plans. Being caught in this cycle of stress caused a migraine that drained me for twenty-four hours. I prayed for guidance. The morning after I slept off the excruciating pain, I picked up a book I had been reading. I had arrived to a chapter on control and letting go. Every article, book, and quote that made its way to me has the same resounding theme.
I decided to write a new morning affirmation for myself. “I let go of my plans to receive God’s plans that are wonderfully beyond what I can imagine for myself. I surrender to something better.”
It is almost laughable that I can be worried about big events in my life all while God is demonstrating control even in the smallest details of my life. Leading me to the right chapter of a book at the perfect moment, speaking to me through a few perfectly timed sound clips from a sermon that was exactly what I needed to hear. Not to mention what God has already brought me out of in my life. Even after what feels like a dramatic rescue, God still leads and guides every seemingly minute detail of my life to continuously make it better and better.
“The man or woman who is wholly or joyously surrendered to Christ can’t make a wrong choice. Any choice will be the right one.”
In my first blog post I wrote about the revelation I experienced regarding salvation. Salvation for me is deeply grounding and the process of being at rest is a daily journey.
“God said to Moses, “ I AM WHO I AM”; and He said, “You shall say this to the Israelites, ‘I AM has sent me to you.’”
Exodus 3:14 AMP
Instead of striving and doing, I want to live in the experience of simply being righteous in Christ. Nothing to prove. Nothing for me to accomplish. It is already finished.
Whatever I need, God says “I Am.” God has an unending supply of all good things. A supply as vast as the ocean, washing over us with wave after wave.
As I write this it is very early on a Sunday morning. My sincere prayer this morning is: “Lord, help me to surrender my plans. Help me to surrender my timing. Continue to grow my faith and continue to show me that the plans you have for my life are so much better than anything I could ever dare to hope or imagine for myself. My future is wrapped up in you goodness. Amen”